Toxic People

In trying to be more positive, you always hear that it's important to surround yourself with positive people. It's interesting how, lately, I've realized how many negative people are in my life: people that complain, are mean to others (or me), or just seem to spread toxicity in their daily lives.

Sometimes, it is hard to get away from these people. You may work with them or they may even be family. Toxic people may be friends with folks that you consider your own friend. I struggle with this the most. There is a woman in my life who is regularly rude to me and actively dislikes me in a public way. I used to be friendly with her but have since ended my relationship with her. We only interact when absolutely necessary. However, she is friends with some of my friends. This is a huge conflict for me because I don't understand how they can continue to be friendly with her when they want to also be friends with me and know how badly she treats me.

I am not quite sure how to deal with this. One option is obviously to withdraw from the women I consider friends. I have done this to some degree already in self-protection. I could have a conversation with them about my issues; I did try this with the woman I am closest with but don't think it really went anywhere. I feel like by continuing to be friends with her despite her behavior, in some ways they are accepting it, whether or not they talked to her about it and especially because, after one particularly hateful interaction with me, she did not apologize or acknowledge she did anything wrong.

I don't like feeling like a victim and I don't want one person to impact how I interact with others but I want to make the best and healthiest choice for myself and my own self-growth.