Feelings about the gym.

I just started back at the gym after over a month off. I did the boot camp class but quit when I realized it was just too much to do in the evenings and really too strenuous for me. I worked out a bit at home but I loathe working out outside. Then, I got sick and had surgery. I finally ventured back to the gym in the last week or so.

And I've hated it.

Partly, my body doesn't feel the same. My hip still feels weird post-surgery so that just makes me nervous. I am not sure how hard to push my body or what it's really capable of. I feel like I pushed it hard for so long that I am trying to find a happy, healthy place of movement.

Working out has also made me more aware of my body, and not really in a good way. I notice the spots that are softer or weaker. I feel the burn of the exercise and register it as pain.

I want to try and focus on working out as functional improvement as opposed to aesthetic improvement, and this may be the key for me. While ignoring all of this and not moving my body feels safe and comfortable, this spot may not be the healthiest for me.