Thursday, October 6, 2011

Setback.

Well, I guess that's how it goes. Ironic since my last post was a step forward. One step forward, one step back sometimes.

Here's what happened: I had a "fat" day. I have not been able to exercise very consistently in the last week or so because my dear child keeps changing her sleep schedule. Two nights ago, she thought she'd have a party from 1-4am! When I don't exercise, a little switch in my head gets flipped and I start obsessing about my food intake and worrying I must be gaining weight. Irrational, I know. I also gave birth only four months ago! *headdesk*

I started demonizing my favorite foods--sweets. I decided I must CUT IT OUT. Smart, I know. I even deleted this blog, thinking that IE must be for weenies and I needed to toughen up and cut out the foods I love the most. Yes, I can be a tad impulsive. :)

This morning, I had a realization about how much I abuse my body. I insult it, dislike it, restrict its food intake and try to control its every move. I diminish its needs by thinking I am too self-absorbed in even worrying about it. I cause myself so much undue stress worrying about gaining weight. I put that in italics to emphasis its dramatic nature and how ridiculous it must really be.

So, I am currently enjoying a candy bar because my body was craving it, despite my trying to please it with other, "healthier" options. And I will enjoy every last bit of it. My new goal is to enjoy my life, my body, my food, and my exercise instead of abusing, diminishing, and demeaning it.

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